Alanz Eyes

Moving on

August 2nd, 2004 - Posted by Alan Howard

I'm having an online conversation with Zhenzhen's husband (now ex-husband) at the moment, and learning some interesting things. He's been open about why she left him, telling me about how he was seeing this Thai girl at the same time as he was married to ZZ. So I've been fishing for more information. Turns out that she'd been talking to this guy since October, a month before I met her. She met him in January and then again in February, when he asked her to marry him.

Apparently she was not only seeing him while seeing me, but she was seeing others while she was married to him. This doesn't surprise me, if it's true. And I suspect it is true, 'cause she had been conducting some kind of relationship with him while she was seeing me.

It helps me realise I've moved on from even wanting to be her friend. I haven't even thought about her over the past couple of weeks, since she contacted me but told me she couldn't come back to Wellington, and was only reminded of her by her loser ex wanting to talk to me today.

Speaking of moving on, 'princess' and I are moving on. I realised a week or so ago that the problems we were having with our relationship was partly my fault, because the more I tried encouraging her out of her negativity, the more she tried to fight my help. Maybe she felt I was lecturing her and as a result she needed to defend herself and justify her actions. I don't know. I just know I wasn't feeling worthwhile to her any more, and felt the only solution was to take a big step backwards and help her regain the positive attitude she used to have, by not being involved so closely and intimately with her.

So we've had a bit of a break, but will also still see each other casually, more as friends, but also occasionally dating. The idea is for us not to be so close, thus removing the pressure of 'relationship', and see where we end up in the future.

Personally, I hope that things turn out well, that she can find her own happiness and confidence again, rather than being afraid of how things will turn out for her and us.

Entry Filed under: Pre-2006